Sunday, November 03, 2013

the motherhood curator

I was just making some cheesy popcorn tonight in preparation for tomorrow's choir rehearsal--it's my turn for mom snack duty. {It is an easy and delicious recipe; just follow my dad's basic popcorn recipe, then as you're drizzling butter, also sprinkle garlic salt and grated parmesan/romano cheese.} As I was stuffing the finished product into ten snack-sized baggies, I began pondering my week ahead.

Vivi has two big goings-on this week, the church play (if you ever want a laugh, watch a bunch of kindergartners try to sing lines from The Mikado) and the school rummage sale. I am volunteering for both, partly out of requirement but mostly out of pressure. I got emails for both events that basically came right out and said "ALL the moms are doing it, and we look at parental support as a necessary component of the success of XYZ fundraising." Oh all right, twist my arm.

So I'm doing them! Which involves not only getting together a costume and snack (for the play) and rummaging for salable items (for the school sale), but also being present before, during, and after said events to wrangle children and things from here to there.

It's not like I have lots of other tasks to do, nor do these events take a lot of brain cells. But as a person who doesn't like to have many things on my to-do list or calendar for each day, it causes me to insert some extra facial twitching and general grumping around the house into my daily routine.

...Did I mention the costume must be black leggings, a black long-sleeve shirt, and black ballet shoes that no one can seem to locate at Target or any local dance shop?...


Taking part in these proceedings is bringing to mind a line from Minimalist Parenting, my latest favorite pep talk in book form. Christine Koh and Asha Dornfest, the authors of the fantastic quick read, say that moms should look at ourselves as curators of the flow of activities and stuff into our homes. I love this notion because it gives me permission to say no to some of the things I can't or don't want to do (not to mention the stuff I don't want...which is going to the rummage sale!). So yes, I agreed to do motherhood's version of monkey tricks this time, but I have been saying no more often than before.

How different is this post from the perky post of nearly a year ago in which I was conditioning myself to say yes? Um, yeah, about that. I think when it comes to risk and adventure, I should say yes more. But when it comes to busy work, cutesy celebrations for every teeny weensy milestone, and other running-around shenanigans, I will practice just saying no.


Marsha said...

I love the parental fundraising guilt trip. There are many reasons for which "no" is a complete sentence - sibling care, paid employment, illness, lack of desire, etc. For my part, I always felt that going to my job so that I wouldn't miss a tuition payment was reason enough to skip the bake sale/rummage sale/twist-a-thon/book fair/whatever. No one ever agreed with me, though, so off I went. Tuesday I'm on for the Election Day bake sale. If I had any sugar-free treats, I'd pressure you to take a couple off my hands. :)

Becky said...

I like that idea. Curating, yes. But when you are just starting out with school-age kids, you do feel like you have to say yes a lot.

That feeling subsides.


Nancy Owens said...

I like the concept of 'curating' also - provides a much-needed sense of empowerment and control in the face of the constant pressure of parental guilt.

Justine said...

Ha, Marsha, we've gotten our fill, but would you like any of our rummage bake sale goodies? ;)

Becky, I'm so glad to hear the feeling subsides, but I'll admit skepticism at this point in the game.

sarah saad said...

شركة تنظيف خزانات بجدة الجوهرة من افضل شركات تنظيف الخزانات بجدة حيث ان تنظيف خزانات بجدة يحتاج الى مهارة فى كيفية غسيل وتنظيف الخزانات الكبيرة والصغيرة بجدة على ايدى متخصصين فى تنظيف الخزانات بجدة
شركة تنظيف خزانات بجدة
اهم شركات كشف تسربات المياه بالدمام كذلك معرض اهم شركة مكافحة حشرات بالدمام والخبر والجبيل والخبر والاحساء والقطيف كذكل شركة تنظيف خزانات بجدة وتنظيف بجدة ومكافحة الحشرات بالخبر وكشف تسربات المياه بالجبيل والقطيف والخبر والدمام
شركة مكافحة حشرات بالدمام
شركة كشف تسربات المياه بالدمام

sarah saad said...

اهم شركات نقل العفش والاثاث بالدمام والخبر والجبيل اولقطيف والاحساء والرياض وجدة ومكة المدينة المنورة والخرج والطائف وخميس مشيط وبجدة افضل شركة نقل عفش بجدة نعرضها مجموعة الفا لنقل العفش بمكة والخرج والقصيم والطائف وتبوك وخميس مشيط ونجران وجيزان وبريدة والمدينة المنورة وينبع افضل شركات نقل الاثاث بالجبيل والطائف وخميس مشيط وبريدة وعنيزو وابها ونجران المدينة وينبع تبوك والقصيم الخرج حفر الباطن والظهران
شركة نقل عفش بجدة
شركة نقل عفش بالمدينة المنورة
شركة نقل عفش بالرياض
شركة نقل عفش بالدمام
شركة نقل عفش بالطائف
شركة نقل عفش بمكة

sarah saad said...

شركة نقل عفش بينبع
شركة نقل عفش ببريدة
شركة نقل عفش بخميس مشيط
شركة نقل عفش بالخرج
شركة نقل عفش بالقصيم
شركة نقل عفش بتبوك
شركة نقل عفش بابها
شركة نقل عفش بنجران
شركة نقل عفش بحائل
شركة نقل عفش بالظهران
شركة نقل عفش بالكويت
شركة نقل عفش واثاث
شركة نقل عفش

Juana P. Alexander said...

Very yummy . So much thanks for such posting .


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